Mom and Dad

I am the youngest child in my family. My mom is 50 years old and my father is 52 years old. I love them so much.

Every time I want to do something, I always ask for their permission. Cause if I don't get one, I will feel miserable doing the thing. I won't regret any time I spent with them, even if I have to turn down my friend's offer.

I always try to please them with everything I can. It's actually a thing I've just realized. When last semester I didn't get very good scores, I couldn't stop thinking about disappointing them. I feel guilty. It's just I don't like disappointing them.

I know, I haven't been a good daughter. I mean, sometimes I said something horrible to them. But that's just a sudden anger, I can't control myself. As soon as I calm down, I really really regret that.

Today, I refused coming with them and the others to Bogor for a holiday. I know that my father really wanted me to go because it's been a long time since we went together. Our family is growing, we are busy with our own activities. My brother sometimes busy with his work, my big sister's now concentrating on her work in the clinic, my other sister's preparing for her final examination, and I'm too much busy with this "subsi" thing. Today, is a national holiday. Everyone has a day off. So it's time to gather around. But, I can't. I have something to do.

Even though I have friends, but sometimes I feel so wrong with them. They're just friends. They don't know the right thing and the best thing for me. But with my parents, I trust them. They know the best thing for me. They care about me, which friends sometimes don't.

I really miss us. And I don't wanna to lose you...