Tracking Changes

Hello readers

It is almost midnight but I feel like writing. I can't sleep, my biological clock has shifted during the holiday.
Anyway, the thing that's been bugging me showed up after I met my high school friends 3 weeks ago. Yes, my SP family. I love them so much, seriously. But that's not the point.

So... what is it then?

It's the changes that I saw in them. Actually it's not only them -the SP guys- but everyone I know; childhood friends, best friends, relatives, etc. Sometimes I take a tour on their blog to read their stories, or simply see their photos, checking them out, see how they've been doing.

Have I told you that I'm a guardian-type-of-person based on David Keirsey's temperament theory? One of guardian characteristics is clinging on to the past. I feel uneasy to see something that is not what it's used to be. That's why I told myself a hundred times to always move on.

Back to the story. Most of my friends have changed. Well, I can say they're basically growing on their own chosen path. The one who was always a subdued person becomes an open one. The other one was quite a passive student back in high school but he's an activist now. But what I can't believe is that they're making a rapid progress on love. The ones whom I thought would never get involve in a relationship apparently has gotten themselves a gf/bf. I can see the changes with my bare eyes. The way they think, the way they act, the way they dress, everything.

Not all of the changes are bad, though. Some changes can be a progress, like many of my friends wear hijab now. My other friends seem to show more respect for other people, at least after somebody scolded them.

But then the question is
How would I know that I haven't changed?
How do I keep track of myself?
How can I decide if I'm making a progress?

That's when I started to realize that I need to write. I need to write so that I can see how far I've been running.

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When I see you
Our memories flash in my mind, like an old movie
It's just that I don't have tapes
to capture every moment and allow me to rewind
to watch our best scene
to enjoy the climax of our tale
Just like a tire will wear out as it spins
My memories will fade out as I age
Leaving blurry trace until I blank out
So I capture it with words
Whenever I miss you I can recite
Recall the voice that once was heard