This might sound lame or dramatic, but I'm starting a revolution for better focus and higher motivation. I'm honestly just tired of how things have been. I'm not chasing the shiny big things, I just want to feel proud of myself for keeping it together. I want the adult version of me to actually "adulting", to set priorities and stick to them.
So this afternoon I went to Gramedia just to sat and read books at their reading corner. I picked a novel about resilience as a starter. Guess what? I managed to focus for 2 straight hours and read 100+ pages. This is a big win for me. Some of you might think "it's just a novel, it's piece of cake". Maybe it is. If it were any other day than Ramadhan and I didn't travel with my hubby, I would have continued reading and finished the whole book. Still, it's a solid stepping stone for me, at least to spark the joy of reading and replace the quick dopamine hits I've been relying on.
I'm also writing on this blog just to keep track of my progress. Whatever's on my mind, I have to put it on this blog, be it my emotions, thoughts, ideas, even random rants. I'm trying to win my focus back
Oh and earlier today, I went to the polyclinic to screen for EEGs for my exam. I went through more than 10 records, but none was "abnormal" enough to make a good discussion, yet not complicated enough for the examiner to ask questions I can't answer
YaAllah, help me. I am trying, I really am.
May all of this effort counts as good deeds. Aamiin.
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